


Pillow Therapy

by jazzypizzaz



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Gen or Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-26
Updated: 2016-03-26
Packaged: 2018-05-29 03:25:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6356998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jazzypizzaz/pseuds/jazzypizzaz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jadzia builds Kira a pillow fort.  They cuddle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pillow Therapy

**Author's Note:**

> This fic occurs a couple weeks after Bareil's death.

Jadzia is lost in thought, absent-mindedly puzzling out the trajectory of a comet due to pass by the station in a month– would it be best to watch it from the upper habitat ring, or..?– so at first doesn’t register at what she sees when she buzzes herself in to Kira’s quarters, which is: 

Kira is standing frozen in horror, her face as red as her uniform, eyes with a crazed look, and her arm outstretched as if she were playing baseball in the holosuite with Benjamin. A quick glance to the left reveals shards of pottery, a wet carpet, and half-dead flowers scattered on the floor– Nerys had thrown a vase against the wall right before Jadzia entered the room.

Jadzia blinks a couple times and takes an unconscious step backwards– she should have knocked or at least commed ahead, how could she have forgotten what Nerys had just gone, it really hadn’t been that long ago…? She assess the state of the rest of the room– pillows are scattered about the room, old clothes are hanging from lamps, and the couch is submerged under no less than three haphazardly placed blankets. Well, too late now, if she’s here she’s going to help, whether Nerys wants her to or not.

Jadzia clears her throat, and Nerys jerks her head abruptly towards the sound, her face contorted into mild panic. Jadzia says, calmly, “We were supposed to meet an hour ago to discuss my report, but– I wasn’t thinking, it can wait until tomorrow.”

Nerys wipes her tear-stained face roughly and starts waving her arms rapidly as if trying to reassemble the chaos in the room into a sense of normal order through sheer force of will. Her eyes dart around wildly, as if just now seeing what havoc she’s wrecked, looking everywhere but at Jadzia. "No, no it’s fine, it’s fine, what– what was the report–?“ Her body jerks towards Jadzia, and she grips her arm, hustling her towards the door. “Here, okay, we need to—let’s get out of here—you shouldn’t have—it’s nothing, let’s go to my office—“

Jadzia stands her ground, unclasps her hands from behind her back to grab both of Nerys’ elbows firmly, holding her in place. “We were supposed to meet, but it can wait. You obviously have more important business right now, don’t worry about it.” She says the last part gently and carefully, trying to imbue as much sincerity as she can into it.

Nerys’ frantic movement stops now, Jadzia’s arms holding her up, and the energy drains out of her like a balloon deflating. This sudden stillness is more worrisome than the previous chaos. She looks up at Jadzia, making eye contact for the first time, and her bloodshot, puffy eyes look even worse up close. Her face is open and raw, and, Jadzia thinks, almost childlike in its soft vulnerability. Jadzia would be willing to bet Nerys didn’t even look childlike when she was a child.

“My whole world turns upside down. Every time I lose someone—every time someone I love… dies… it turns my world upside down.” Nerys says this softly, almost inaudible. She smiles wryly, rolling her eyes towards the mess in the room, rather embarrassed. “Sometimes literally. It fills me up inside—the pain and rage—like an ocean of energy, and the only way to get rid of it is to let it out through my body. It helped when there were Cardassians to fight, in the Resistance, but here it’s all talking and paperwork and…I know it’s been a couple weeks, but…I—I’ll be fine, I’ll power through. I always do, no one ever sees me like this—“

“Maybe your world is upside down, but from the perspective of a moon like me floating nearby, up is really the same as down when you’re in space, ya know. What really matters is whether your center of gravity is the same. If you can keep all your hara cats and palukoos and forests from drifting off towards the sky, then it’ll all be okay and everything will keep spinning.” Jadzia offers this piece of advice earnestly.

Nerys stares at her for a long moment, eyes furrowed, then says flatly, “That doesn’t make a lick of goddamn sense.”

Jadzia’s eyes widen in surprise, then she bursts out laughing, great belly laughs that seem to involve her whole body, and she lets go of Nerys to try to contain it. “I—ha!—I suppose not—“

Nerys’ face contorts as if she’s fighting internally against her better nature, then joins in, the physical joy of letting loose, of laughing, seems to evaporate her rage and melancholy and heavy sadness, until she feels lighter than air, as if she might float away. “My—palukoos–! And my—hara—cats—floating towards the—sun—!!” Neither of them can get more than a word out between laughs, and they continue laughing this way, slapping their knees and holding their bellies until both their eyes are wet now, crying from the absurdity of it all.

“Wooooo—“ After a couple minutes in this manner, Nerys takes a deep breath then exhales all at once, regaining her composure. She is bent over slightly, her hands on her thighs holding her up. “It’s a good thing we need you for science, because you would make a lousy counselor.”

Jadzia, wiping tears from her eyes and taking deep breaths to try to settle down, lets out one last chortle and shrugs, her hands flexing as if to say well what can ya do? “You know, Audrid was a great listener, she gave fantastic advice, so sympathetic, but with three hundred years of life experience, you start to think you can trust the first thing that pops into your head.” She smiles, her eyes twinkling with glee. “And it did work, didn’t it?”

Nerys exhales in delight. "Pfff, well I don’t remember the last time I laughed like that, so I suppose so.” Her bright grin holds, then fades slowly as reality fades back in a bit, and remembers her sorrow. She shrugs and lets out a sharp huff, puts her hands on her hips and surveys the room. "Ugh. I made a real mess in here.“ She sighs heavily and flops down onto the couch, exhausted and closes her eyes. "I don’t even know why I have all these pillows. Where did they come from? I’m just making more work for myself.”

Jadzia looks thoughtful. "You know… I don’t see a mess here, I see an opportunity!“ She grins mischievously, and Nerys opens her eyes to flash a skeptical grimace. "C'mon, let’s build a pillow fort!”

“A what?”

“A pillow fort! We’ll create a cave with the blankets, fortify the walls and floor with pillows, and then we’ll settle in and enjoy.”

“Why? That’s absurd.” Nerys stares at Jadzia in utter confusion, as if she were suggesting jumping out an airlock to try to catch a star.

Jadzia keeps grinning and shoos Nerys off the couch. She starts stacking the pillows in a semi-circle around the couch and assembling the fort. "Hmm, and if we move the lamp here, then drape these blankets like this… Tuck in the remainder, tie it off, and these pants and shirts could help build this wall a little higher… Oh! Do you have candles? Like ones that are okay for non-religious use? Okay we’ll light those around the edge, turn on the containment field so we don’t light on fire. Hmm turn off the lights… Oh! and I’ll replicate some snacks, maybe some synthale?“

While Jadzia is giving a running commentary, Nerys stands off to the side still clutching the last pillow to her chest, watching in bewilderment. Jadzia, having obtained the aforementioned sustenance, places the goods inside the softly lit cloth bound cave and gestures Nerys to enter through the small opening left between two sheets.

"Cmon, join me.”. Jadzia crawls inside on her hands and knees, leans against the edge of the couch and sinks into the pillows on the floor.

After a moment, Jadzia hears a few soft curses, then Nerys’ face pops through the opening and she awkwardly fumbles up beside Jadzia. "Where am I supposed to go, there’s no room–“

"Shh shhhh, it’s okay. Lean against me, there ya go, just put your head– there isn’t this nice?” Nerys’ head is now settled against Jadzia’s shoulder, the rest of her body flush against Jadzia’s side, and get arm looped across Jadzia’s waist. Jadzia brings one arm up to stroke Nerys’ head and the other to lie on top of her arm.

“This is weird. Now what?” Nerys’ cynicism is a bit muffled by her face nuzzled against Jadzia’s collarbone.

“But it’s nice right? Just relax,” Jadzia says with a bemused tone.

Nerys huffs into her shoulder and is silent as Jadzia strokes her hair, her hand wandering to rub her back comfortingly. They stay like this in silence for a while, Nerys’ breathing slows and the built up tension leaves her body.

Jadzia closes her eyes, sure that Nerys is asleep, and then hears her say softly, “He used to hold me, like this. I don’t ever remember being held. My mother–and, well, my dad– I was never held like this before like he held me.”

Jadzia hums to signal she’s listening without interrupting Nerys’ quiet confidence. They stay like this several more minutes, and Jadzia is starting to nod off when she hears, “I didn’t think I’d feel this safe again.”

\--------------------------------

Nerys sleeps the deepest she has in days, and when she wakes Jadzia is still there, arm wrapped around her, surrounded by softness and contentment.


End file.
